My brother in-law and I decided to Redbox a flick we could likely mock. What better than an over-the-top action film starring a 90 year old 'roid head?
Without further adieu...
Bullet to the Head
Starring Sylvester Stallone, Sarah Shahi, and Jason Momoa
Overview - James "Bobo" Bonomo (Stallone) is the best at what he does. He's the guy they call when they need to send a message. Everything's coming up roses until one hit goes bad. Now he must protect his money, his daughter, and his name.
Review - Stallone is one of those type-cast guys who delivers the same thing every time. He trains hard, and hits harder. He has never been a high-caliber actor like a Johnny Depp, or Giovanni Ribisi, but he never leaves you hanging on a right hook to the jugular followed by a clever jab to the funny bone. This movie is, simply put, more of the same. The only difference is that he is nearly a century old, and doesn't quite move like he used to. To tell you the truth, I'd love to see a final "Rocky" movie where he finds a hungry young man and "passes the torch". Not so they can keep making "Rocky" films, but instead so he can admit that he doesn't HAVE TO act in every action movie any more. Why not take what you've learned being the star and direct good action films Sly? I'm sure he will soon enough. What really surprised me is that Stallone is INCREDIBLY ripped in this one. He fights a guy in a bath house, and he is so cut, that Dwayne Johnson might be calling him for advice.
Before I go on a rant about some of the annoying or awful things in this movie, I want you to keep in mind that I base my reviews on mostly entertainment. However, if a movie is completely bone-headed, but fun....I can't ignore the bone-headed...ness. For example, I recently reviewed the Jessie Eisenberg movie "Now You See Me". The truth is that the movie was very entertaining, but the overall plot of the movie didn't make any sense. Therefore it dramatically took away from the entertainment value. So if I berate a movie and then tell you it's fun, that's usually why.
Let's talk about the other stars of this film. Sarah Shahi and Jason Momoa. Sarah Shahi has done very little on the silver screen. Most of her appearances have been in reoccurring roles on popular serial shows like "Person of Interest" and "Chicago Fire". No doubt she is a piece of eye candy, but I can't put my finger on if I like her as an actress. I tend to find that if an actress is incredibly good looking, it makes it easier to look past her inability to truly act (A.K.A. Mila Kunis). So, if you are contemplating watching this one because of the shots of her in a white "beater" tank top, you won't be disappointed. If you're hoping she'll blow you away with her ability to deliver lines and emotions.....not so much. Let's move on to Jason Momoa. Getting his start on the unexplained hit TV show "Baywatch" back in 1999, he quickly mastered the smug smoldering smile (say that 3 times fast), that would race the hearts of many-a-lady. He got his first break on the TV show "Stargate: Atlantis" as Ronon Dex. A native to an undiscovered planet that joins up with he intrepid crew that eventually defeats the Wraith warriors. Since then he has decided to move to the big screen and first appeared in the movie "Conan The Barbarian" in 2011. I can't say he did a good job, but there is something about him that is charming. So even the fact that he doesn't act incredibly well doesn't bother me. He's a giant man who can do some decent stunts. Seeing as how that's all that's really expected of him, you get what you wish for. I don't dislike him as much as most, but I do not think he's "the next big thing". The saddest part was that Thomas Jane ("The Punisher") was originally cast for the role that Momoa took over. I love Thomas Jane, and he would have been fantastic. Though I think he would have overshadowed Sylvester a bit. I think Sly should have directed and Jane should have been the star of this one. Probably why the director dropped him like a bad habit.
Director, Walter Hill, hes done very little impressive work. On his resume' you will find such titles as "48 Hrs", "Red Heat", and "Another 48 Hrs". Needless to say, his films are no "Dark Knight". This movie was no exception. It wasn't visually thrilling, or really well communicated. It was an action film where action stars act all.....action-like. If you want to see a film where muscle-bound blockheads beat each other up, and don't exactly deliver the most moving of dialogue, then look no further than the work of one Walter Hill. Hill and Stallone both did numerous re-writes on the film, leading me to quote a statement that my boss constantly makes. "Sometimes the more you try to fix something, the more you screw it up."
Overall I would give this one a 2 out of 5. It's worth a watch to chuckle at Sylvester, but you won't walk away thinking that "he's back!"
Suggestions? email me at entertaindave@gmail.com
I also relish feedback, so email me and follow me on Twitter @entertaindave
No comments:
Post a Comment